Hi there,
There are many bad and good things happening around us. Sometimes, the bad even outpasses the good. But let’s streamline my rants to all that is happening to you and me in particular. Are they always good? To be honest, the answer is NO. There are certain bad things that happen to us that we can’t just control. In life, we are bound to have a fair share of negativity: whether it’s failure, rejections, disappointment, huge loss, etc. In the book, I read last month, “ The subtle art of not giving a fuck” by Mark Mason, I picked some important points that can help us when facing life-challenging situations. Let’s go through those points one by one.
1. Continuous Happiness is a Problem
We have been biologically wired to recognize and solve problems; the reward is happiness. The idea of this point is simple: a life without problems doesn’t exist and this makes happiness a discontinuous concept to relate with. In fact, excessive happiness for a long time is a problem — your soul would need a new experience. So, whether you are rich or poor, there are problems to face and it takes a mature mind to understand that suffering is inevitable, regardless of your social status. Better put, we are all fighting different wars. Therefore, don’t give a fu*ck about how unfair life has been to you, but focus on choosing your battles right. The salient question raised by the author is: “ What are you willing to struggle for.”
2. You Are Always Choosing
You are directly or indirectly at the choosing wing of life. I mean you have the choice to compound or alleviate your problems. For instance, there is inflation and we are confronted with other issues emanating from global politics. But in all these, it is our responsibility to choose the problems we give a fuck about. It is also our responsibility to choose the right attitude. So, when confronted by devastating life situations, try to ask yourself: what is the best thing I can do. The author made this important point: not choosing is also a choice. But it means you have chosen to be defeated by that situation.
3. Failure is the Way Forward
There are many beautiful ideas I have thought of as solutions to solving one problem or another. However, I see myself not doing anything about those ideas at the end of the day. This particular point stresses the need to do something, that is ACT. We sometimes bow to fear of failure, and this is why we pull back and do nothing. Our schooling system and even social media are designed to paint pictures of success. What about FAILING? Actually, failure is an important process to success; we need a self reorientation and humility to embrace it wholesomely.
4. Simply say NO
One of the things I learn daily is the subtle art of saying NO to things that are not important. Do you have boundaries as to what you permit into your life? Are you the type that says YES to offers from any Tom, Dick, and Harry? Saying NO can be difficult sometimes but you need it. You have to reject some things in order to stand up or value something else. Commitment to a few important things can give you freedom and save you from a lot of distractions. Have you mastered how to say no? You can drastically improve your attention and focus by committing to a specific few things.
5. Death is Coming Anyway
Death is inevitable — it is coming for us all. Don’t deny death and don’t strive for its random selection. Death terrifies everyone (always remember you are not the only one) and that fact in itself inspires a lot of people to make a difference in their lifetime. A near-death experience has given many a chance to live in a better way. For some, the conceptualization of how they want to be remembered has given them a unique meaning. Whichever the case may be, what are your immortality projects? Have you identified them? You are a gift to our world. So shine your light such that death can only take a little away when he is here.
Conclusion
Have ever felt as if the world around you is crumbling. Disappointments and rejections here and there. The sky may be falling close to you and everything seems to have scattered. But great is a man that can stand and keep moving, without losing focus in the face of greater opposition. Welcome to a new day for you to keep moving and fight negativity.
I hope you have found some valuable lessons in this read. Follow me for more stories, book reviews, and interesting content on personal development.
I am Samuel Ayankoso (the Quester)
